You know what I like to do? I like to hang out in places I am not supposed to. Sometimes it’s planned, sometimes not.
I remember back in 1990 my roomate worked in one of Quebec City’s few gay saunas. I had to go see him for some reason and stopped by his work. This 19 year old girl had to stand there for 15 minutes ‘inside a gay sauna’. At some point the manager walked by me and backed up. He said hi and physically moved me so that I could not be seen and said to me: “You know a lot of the guys here are married, they will freak out if they see a girl!” For a while I pondered why married men would hang out at gay saunas but my boyfriend Nicolas, who was a gorgeous 27 year-old intellectual bisexual separatist prostitute from Lac-Saint-Jean, explained it to me in great details.
Obviously I should not be hanging out in a gay sauna but what I found out later is that it’s less annoying than hanging out in a straight sauna.
I also get a kick out of hearing stuff I am not supposed to hear. I love to hear what guys say to each other when they forget that a woman is listening. I used to watch ‘The Man Show‘ and made a it a point to keep tabs on what guys like to watch.
A few months ago I was vedging on Bearded Dicaprio’s sofa on a Saturday afternoon. (That is my new nickname for BF#2. Even though there is a fine line between Dicaprio in a Beard and This, I can’t get enough of the beard.) We were watching his immense bachelor HD flat screen TV and flipping through all those cable channels and still there was nothing interesting on. I saw a glimpse of this show on Spike TV called “The Ultimate Fighter”. “Dumb-looking teenagers hitting each other in the face!” I exclamed. I was really curious about htis so I downloaded an episode the next week. Turns out it wasn’t teenagers I had just flipped channels when Matt Riddle was on and… well you catch my drift. So I started watching this show and got totally hooked.
At first I thought the guys were like nothing I’d ever seen or heard before… and then that sort of became why I liked it. Essentially they are also like guys I am unlinkely to run into, ever so it’s quite interesting.
Watching guys bash each other’s face in with the intention to injure was a bit strange in the beginning. But when you think about it I’ve seen people, in person, cut, burn or pierce each other for sport or sexual gratification so to each his/her own. I still fast forward through the fights but enjoy the post-fight description and commentary.
Right now I am very frustrated with Junie Browning. What a punk! I would tell you what I would do to that guy to straighten him out but that would make Yoshi envious. For a while there I thought Junie would never make it to the fight but then again… he still has a bit of time to fuck it up. I have to admit I really like Roli Delgado so I am going to be rooting for him next week.
So I have put The Ultimate Fighter on my metaphorical porn shelf along with The Tudors (and Rome but you’ll have to wait for that porn review.)
So here are my Top Ten reasons to watch The Ultimate Fighter
- Matt Hughes smiling (or not…) and that recurring shot going up his poster in the training center. Nice chest hair Matt!
- Nathan Diaz flipping out because he doesn’t get the the actual non-gay meaning of “suck it”
- Forrest Griffin saying: “Gimme all the ugly guys!”
- Nice arms and hands.
- The bio bits before the fight.
- Perving Dante Rivera, Gray Maynard and Keith Jardine.
- Watching guys who should know better drink themselves into embarrassing situations, destroy rental properties, fight over stupid shit, say stuff they’ll regret and pee on each other’s bed.
- Rooting for the nerds like Joe Lauzon and Luke Cummo (I mean that as a compliment.)
- The over-the top body art.
- Guys crying. I dig that.
In closing I must say that Dana White uses the work ‘Fuck’ way too much… Dude it’s not really a verb nore an adjective. Only one free ‘fuck*’ per segment… else it makes you sound dim. But that’s just an opinion from a chick your age.